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Meital Yaniv, a former Israeli soldier and former Zionist, shared their experiences with identity and Palestinian solidarity in a conversation on the ties between the environment and the ongoing Israel-Hamas war.

The discussion, hosted in Marshall Auditorium by 315Students4Liberation, centered around Yaniv’s “letting go” of their former Israeli soldier identity. Titled “Breaking Free from the Ecocidal War Machine,” the conversation was facilitated by Sarah Nahar, a Ph.D. candidate in religion and environmental studies at Syracuse University and SUNY-ESF, and took an in-depth look at Zionism and Israeli identity amid the Israel-Hamas war.

Throughout the conversation, Yaniv cited parts of their book “Bloodlines” — described as an “intimate dive into the Israeli apartheid regime from the perspective of an ex-Israeli/ex-Zionist soldier,” according to their website — to highlight their Israeli background and connection to the land of Palestine.

“My conception is my indoctrination into soldierhood. A soldier’s identity is something you are groomed for and then you become it, the shape doesn’t leave you when you leave the army,” Nahar read from their book. “You need to consciously decide to leave your identity behind and that is a disorienting process of patience and grief. It is a departure from something your body knows as home.”

The conversation was part of ESF’s Earth Week celebration, which Nahar said was appropriate since there is an interconnectedness between the Earth and the ongoing Israel-Hamas war. Nahar said the “genocide is ecocide,” and said the first two months of the war generated more planet-warming emissions than the annual carbon footprint of the world’s top 20 climate-vulnerable nations.

The Israel-Hamas war began 201 days ago as of Wednesday. Since Hamas’ Oct. 7 attack that killed 1,200 people, Israel’s military has killed more than 34,000 Palestinians, according to Gaza’s Ministry of Health.

Reflecting on their personal experiences with Palestinian solidarity, Yaniv said they initially approached the issue from a place of guilt. They said they now “show up” for Palestinian solidarity for themselves because it is “the only way I get liberated, the only way I get free.”

Yaniv said many Jewish Americans have been “desensitized,” and the grief and insecurity that many are feeling is not solely rooted in the ongoing conflict, but influenced by generations of trauma.

“They first need to understand that the reason they feel unsafe has nothing to do with a place called Israel or Palestine,” Yaniv said. “It has to do with so many other traumas that have happened in these generations.”

Yaniv emphasized the importance of finding a unified sense of belonging through connection with the Earth rather than focusing on differences of opinion or nationality.

It can be hard to balance daily tasks in a “time of genocide,” Nahar said, but it’s important for individuals to focus on empowering change. Yaniv echoed this sentiment and said Palestinians must maintain compassion, even for those they might have difficulty finding compassion for.

Addressing the conflict occurring in Gaza, Yaniv said empathy is important because the actions of Israeli soldiers today can be attributed to the same training that they grew up with.

“It’s not out of evil, it’s out of training,” Yaniv said. “That training is to not see Palestinians as human beings or people deserving of anything … they are not human beings in the eyes of the soldier.”

Bahar Zaker, a registered nurse who attended the event, said the conversation made her realize many parallels between her work and the ongoing conflict.

“When I’m at work, I see my patients sometimes dying or dealing with disease and pain, and then my mind goes to the pictures of people in Palestine,” Zaker said. “I have these two dualities: my patients here that I’m trying to take care of and the patients there that maybe no one is there to take care of.”

Following the conversation, Nahar opened the event up to a Q&A with the nearly 50 attendees. One attendee, who did not share their name, asked Yaniv what right they had to speak about trauma when other people don’t have the opportunity to.

Acknowledging the harm they said they have previously caused as a former Israeli soldier, Yaniv said they only have the right to speak on their own experience of “returning to (their) senses” and praying for the “liberation of Palestine and the land of our bodies” as they leave their soldier identity behind. Yaniv, who said they grew up in a right-wing Zionist family, said they understand the trained “Zionist Israeli mindset.”

“Because I was raised in that way, and because something in my body said ‘no’ after the first time I had to send planes into Gaza,” Yaniv said. “I’ve been in the process of trying to understand what I was raised to do.”

Another attendee, a child who did not share his name, said hearing stories about the ongoing conflict has “made (his) stomach churn,” and said Yaniv was courageous for speaking out about such an important issue.

Reflecting on their own experience of being born into Israeli soldierhood, Yaniv said people need to allow their hearts to “break open” to fully engage with the reality of violence and oppression occurring as tensions continue to rise.

“I really hope that this conversation will break our hearts a little bit more so that we can show up in this moment where our kin are being slaughtered in the West Bank and in Gaza and inside Israeli prisons and our kin on universities lawn are being brutally arrested right now by police, by riot gear, may that heartbreak shape us,” Yaniv said.

Published on April 25, 2024 at 1:29 am

Contact Samantha: saolande@syr.edu